I have this list in the back of my Prego Planner and it has ALL SORTS of stuff you need for a new baby. Of course you can adjust it to your needs but as for being a first time mom, I thought it was perfect for me to go by.

Now I’m down to the wire and looking at what I have an what I still need. Any tips for what I can live without, or what I should add?

I’m listing it below, and throughout pregnancy I’ll mark off what I have to have a visual of what I still need. A strike through means I have it!

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I’ve been back and forth with the doula thing and weighing the pluses and minuses for me. I made a list of the positives and negatives of hiring a doula, and while the list of positives was longer when it came to services a doula can provide… I’ve read the benefits over and over (and doulas themselves will always tell you the MANY benefits). But when I compared it to what mattered MOST to me: Feeling like my husband and I are experiencing it and making decisions together, experiencing this special milestone alone (Ok, so when you’re pushing you’re not alone but there are hours of down time between nurse visits and whatnot) and feeling a since of accomplishment that WE did it… It outweighed many of the reasons I wanted to hire a doula.

Sure, you can have a doula take a back seat, and many husbands love having that extra support, being able to take breaks etc. But my mom will be near (probably in the hall because that’s how seriously I want it to be about me and my husband) and she can help with that, and I’m not THAT needy of a person to where he can’t leave me for a few minutes. Heck… I may even want to “suffer” alone.

Then came the issue of cost. I found great doulas who offered their experience and all sorts of techniques for around $500 and up… I found one who’s attended a few births and would charge me about $250-$300. I wasn’t set on paying all of that money for something I was paying for reluctantly… Heck, I don’t know if I’d end up wanting to send her away in the middle of it, and in that case I’m still paying her!

One woman wrote me back who is still working on her certification and she offered to do the doula services for free. I thought I’d be jumping for joy at the chance to have a doula for free, but I wasn’t. That’s when I realized it wasn’t all about the money. I told my husband and he pointed out if I wanted my mom there to help ok, but if not it may be weird inviting another woman in instead of her… Especially someone who may not be much more skilled than my mom may be.

I also don’t think a doula in training would exactly “know” more than we could know, and a free doula could just as easily be my mom (if I decide to let her in) or my husband (although, no, he hasn’t birthed before-Some of the doulas I talked to hadn’t either- I trust him more than anyone).

Finally, I debated why I really wanted one… Ok, there’s someone there who can help me remember my goals and plans… My husband and I are pretty strong willed people and we’re not going to jump at anything without discussing the pros and cons, and chances are if we have done our research and know what we’re talking about.. And if we all have TIME to discuss the pros and cons it’s not an emergency issue and we won’t need to feel rushed into anything. I feel bad for people who tell me “if I had had a doula I wouldn’t have had a cesarean.” To me that means you know your cesarean was unnecessary. I think more important than hiring a doula is being informed and educated about birth and not being afraid to ask the doctor or midwife questions or stand up for yourself. If I do end up having a cesarean it won’t be because I didn’t have a doula, but because I said it was ok to do one, and because my husband and I feel like it’s best. And I’ll be ok with that, and I won’t regret it, and I won’t feel bad about my birth experience. Because to me what matters most is my husband and I talking those things out and making decisions together. Above all else in my birth plan is: “Take our time” and talk it out.

I’ve thought about it A LOT. I’ve interviewed doulas, I’ve read all the facts but I don’t think a doula is for everyone and as of now… I don’t think it’s for me.

Who knows, maybe with baby number two we’ll try one, but this time, I want it to try it with me and my husband.

My husband, my doula

]]> http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/02/26/not-to-doula/feed/ 10 http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/02/24/vote-for-future-mama-jogging-stroller/ http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/02/24/vote-for-future-mama-jogging-stroller/#comments Thu, 25 Feb 2010 04:25:47 +0000 Annie Foonberg http://www.therealmomtv.com/?p=714 Have YOU VOTED? Vote NOW, Vote Often and Vote until March 25th when we reveal which Bob Jogging Stroller YOU Voted for, for Future Mama!

http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/02/11/vote-for-future-mamas-stroller-from-bob/

What to name her… That’s a big, no HUGE one. Deciding the name that she’ll be known by for the rest of her life… Talk about pressure! I went through an entire iPhone ap worth of baby names. Saved my favorites then had my husband tell me which of those he liked. Six were left. We somehow narowed it down to three, and now, I think one.

Now don’t get too excited, I’m not planning on sharing the name until after birth. I was looking for mostly “J” names but “Gabriella” and “Tatiana” were in our top 4.

Yesterday I ordered the wooden letters I plan to decorate for her nursery. I had a dream about her the night before an in it we said her name. It fit perfectly in my dream and it felt right the next morning, so I went with it! My husband likes it too.

Now some of the other choices we’re faced with… To doula or not to doula? That’s a big, HUGE question. I only have one friend in real life who hired a doula and I LOVED reading about her experience, it’s just that when it comes down to it… For us, I wonder if it’s REALLY necessary. I know we don’t need one to survive a birth, and some say it’s made their experience better, others were annoyed by them, so I’m not sure what to think.

I’ve had phone interviews with a few and corresponded via email to a dozen others  and while some I really like and feel a connection to, I haven’t found the perfect one yet that goes with out budget, personalities, and qualifications. The search is exhausting too. With a full time job pushing out 50+ hrs of week, plus babysitting and writing on the side, it doesn’t leave a ton of time and patients to keep searching for a doula when I’m not even positive we want one yet.

I’m not going to give up though. It’s still pretty early and my OB’s office says they have some referrals so I’ll check that out too. And if we don’t go with one, I’m sure it won’t be the end of the world.

Did you have a doula.

Then there’s carseat choices, bassinet choices, baby carrier choices. Aye, I guess it’s all a part of the journey. Wish me luck with it all!

Oh, and don’t forget to help me with my stroller choice here.

How did you decide on everything? Recommendations?

Voting Ends March 25th so be sure to Vote, Vote Often and Vote a LOT!

Vote NOW, Vote as much as you want!

STROLLER REVOLUTION STROLLER

BOB SPORT UTILITY STROLLER

BOB STROLLER STRIDE JOGGING STROLLER

Descriptions:

Bob Sport Utility Stroller

This stroller for active parents has the go-anywhere, tough, durable, lightweight design of a mountain bike. 16″ knobby tires offer maximum traction, and the fast, two-step fold-up design for stow-and-go portability. State-of-the-art suspension system adjusts to provide ultimate comfort and performance for bigger or smaller kids, a 5-point safety harness delivers security, and the ultra padded seat reclines up to 70°. Measures 41″ H x 29″ W x 51″ L.Accommodates children up to 70 pounds.

BOB Revolution Stroller

Get your exercise while baby tags along. As versatile as it is comfortable, the Revolution features 16″ rear wheels and a 12″ front swivel wheel that lets you turn the stroller smoothly and swiftly while walking. When you’re ready to step things up, the front wheel locks in the forward position, preventing it from steering off course. A 5-point safety harness and safety wrist strap keep your baby secure, and a seat recline drops to a near-flat position for baby sleep time. The suspension system ensures a smooth ride even over rough ground. There’s also plenty of storage, including a cargo pouch, a backseat storage unit, and dual seat pockets

BOB Stroller Stride Stroller

OB Strides Fitness Stroller in Red is designed with a fast, two-step folding for compact storage and easy travel. This BOB Jogging Stroller features two exercise tubes of different tensions and the Stroller Strides fitness manual packed inside a BOB handlebar console. The 12 front wheel swivels for increased maneuverability and locks forward for jogging. The BOB Strides Fitness Stroller’s suspension system provides an exceptionally smooth ride. A padded reclining seat provides for your child’s comfort in this jogging stroller, while the rear-wheel, foot-activated parking brake is easy to operate and locks out both rear wheels.

I think the fact that I pretty much out and said that I wanted a girl made a lot of people think I was having a boy. After all it would be ironic. Me, the girliest girl you’ll meet, favorite color pink, pregnant with a boy!

I had a 50/50 chance so I prepared myself for a boy. I browsed for boy clothing, searched for boy bedding, and even got a few “blue things.” But when the tech pointed the ultrasound wand directly to my little Spawnie’s bum sticking straight in the air I knew my dreams were coming true. She confirmed my hopeful wishes when she said “It’s a girl!”

I’ve already bought more than 15 dresses… Yes, 15. I know people say not to because you’ll get so much stuff as gifts, but that’s why I’ve been varying the sizes according seasons! I feel like a pro already.

It all feels more real now. I’m so much more excited to be having a daughter. There’s more of a face with the idea of my child now, an actual person tied to my emotions. More care in my day, more thought in what I eat, how I take care of myself… Take care of US! It’s not an “it” anymore, it’s a “she” it’s a “mine!” My baby girl! My daughter.

]]> http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/02/11/its-a-baby-girl/feed/ 2 http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/01/31/getting-ready-for-my-new-mommy-shoes/ http://www.therealmomtv.com/2010/01/31/getting-ready-for-my-new-mommy-shoes/#comments Sun, 31 Jan 2010 23:53:16 +0000 Jennifer http://www.therealmomtv.com/?p=514 It’s been a little while since I’ve updated you on some of my progress. In my last post I felt like I was FREAKING OUT. I was worried about fulfilling my career duties (which trust me, can be PRETTY demanding) and adding my motherly duties on top of it. At times it feels daunting and nearly impossible, but I know so many women do it… So I should be able to do it to right? Thinking about all that mothers do REALLY makes me think we deserve medals or something.

Luckily I got to have a conversation with Real Mom’s Life Coach, Leslie Gail. First off, let me tell you… I had no idea what a “life coach” really was or did, or why one would need one but after talking to her I can see why they are so helpful. Sometimes you just need a friend to remind you that “you can do it” and help show you how to get there. It’s especially nice when it’s someone who’s “been there done that.”

Over the past couple of weeks I’ve been thinking a lot about how I normally like to plan my life out to a T. I like having goals that I’m working for and I like knowing that I can be “the best” at something. Becoming a mother is something I know it going to be hard and I worried a lot about how it would change me as a person. But then all of a sudden it just clicked. I don’t have to define myself one way or another, or act like a totally different person once I’m a mom. I know my baby and I will have to do some conforming to each other but that doesn’t mean we have to fight tooth and nail to change each other.

Leslie reminded me of a thought process I used to use a lot to keep things in perspective. She said “On your deathbed what will you wish you spent less time on?” I often ask myself “In 100 years, what will matter?” I believe in life after death but I believe I’m not taking my wealth with me… So why stress over wealth? I can try to better my life but it’s not worth spending my entire life stressing over. I need to keep that perspective.

A little friend I babysit (Spawnie's Future BFF) and I at work

I think motherhood will change me some, but it’ll be gradual and not as drastic as I originally thought. I’m going to go with the flow, keep doing my thing, keep setting goals… But give myself some slack if it takes longer to achieve them. I’m a blessed woman with so many opportunities and talents and having my beautiful baby I’m sure will only open my eyes to more opportunities for my family. Having my baby will better my life. I know there will be tough times, but I’m so blessed to have gotten this far, I can only imagine things getting better, and I can’t wait.

Well, it sorta started that way. Excitement of our great news took over our minds, but life went on. I still go to work, still have the same responsibilities, same worries… And then some. But add on the tasks of preparing to be a good mother and doing what I can to take care of my little Spawnie now.

I have always been an emotional person but since becoming pregnant my feelings have been magnified by hormones. So my good days feel extra good, which is nice… But the bad days feel extra bad, and although in my mind I can tell myself the snark remark someone said to me shouldn’t be taken so seriously, I can’t keep my mind off of it, and usually can’t keep from crying.

My body is changing, my mind and emotions are going through changes, and my life is changing. I want so badly to be a good mother and sometimes I worry I’ll forget to do something now that could really help me later. I try to hard to be prepared but sometimes the thought of how much I could do, or how I’m falling short makes me feel inadaquet.

I’m doing my best to handle it all but sometimes it feels overwhelming. One thing I keep telling myself though is to enjoy the present while preparing for the future, and that I’m too blessed to be stressed, but sometimes those chants don’t fully sink into my brain.

Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to have a relaxing prenatal massage my next day off cause I could really use it!

Did you ever feel overwhelmed before becoming a mother? Know of other stress relieving techniques?

This portable system allows you to watch over your child with a handheld monitor and be alerted whenever she makes a sound, even when the system is in standby mode. The night vision feature allows you to see your child when its dark, and you can play comforting lullabies directly from the camera. The BABYVIEW20 is the perfect solution for every parent – now you can rest easy knowing your child is safe!

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Ever wish you could dress your best at 60?

Wish you could tell your mom to not come over as much?

We put these questions to the test with our guests, Pamela Schaefer and Mary Clark, this week on Real Mom TV.

Don’t miss Thursday, January 7, 2010 Episode; Mature Real Mom and hear what these seasoned moms have to share.  Learn tips from our Life Coach, Leslie Gail as she unravels the mysteries surrounding moms and daughters relationships and much, much more!

Stay tuned through out the entire episode as we mention Stylist and Creator of Real Mom TVs very own, Spring Style Tips!

You won’t want to miss this episode as we announce the FIRST contest for our viewers to help Future Mama pick her Baby Monitor!

This week Real Mom TV is sure to make you smile, laugh and learn!

If you are in the Denver area and would like to be in the LIVE Studio audience, please email your request to: assist@therealmomtv.com

Part of it (my excuse) was feeling so sick and nauseous all of the time. I hardly wanted to eat ANYTHING, much less the balanced diet my body really needed. Steamed vegetables—what use to be my favorite snack—quickly transformed into a food that made my stomach curl at just the thought.

My water intake has plummeted; even though I know that now is the time I need MORE water to stock up on extra blood and amniotic fluids.

I had a chance to quickly chat with Julie Hammerstein, the nutritionist I’m going to be working with throughout my pregnancy, and boy can I tell you how excited I am. At first, the thought of being honest with a professional right now made me quiver a little, but I know it’ll really help me, and hopefully sharing this information will be helpful to you!

I’m not holding back! I’m going to tell her how a couple of weeks ago the only thing I wanted for dinner four consecutive nights was a McDonald’s double cheeseburger meal (yes, super sized). I’m going to confess how my baby is as addicted to hotdogs as I was when I was seven. No… You don’t understand. Christmas day I made my husband take me to 7/11 so I could get my fix on a 99 cent hotdog. Yes, I had a hotdog for Christmas dinner (don’t worry, I had IHOP later). I hear that usually what you’re craving is what you and your need but that doesn’t exactly explain my cravings for grease and leftover pig parts.

I’m going to ask her for tips on drinking enough water through the day without feeling like a water balloon. Don’t even get me started on fitness either! I purposely am delaying my conversation with Jason, the trainer, a few weeks so I attempt to get a few workouts in before then so I don’t feel as guilty!

And if you have any other good pregnancy eating or fitness tips, please, feel free to share! I have a LONG way to go!

Don't worry, that's hot coco, and Christmas 2008. Not much has changed though... Notice the hotdog?

Keep the tips coming!

The Real Mom TV

There was no resisting this baby fever. The venom spread through my veins and I was turned. No longer did I dream of promotions and luxurious high-end cars. I wanted (no not a mini van) one of those cute little maternity gowns I had seen a year ago, and a baby in my belly below it.

I don’t do anything part way. Go big or go home. That’s kind of how I do things. And I knew if I wanted to get pregnant I wanted to  research the best way to do it beforehand.

I started taking prenatal vitamins months before we tried to conceive. I learned that there was such a thing as sperm friendly (and not so sperm friendly) lubricant. I changed my diet, my fitness routine, I knew when it came time to pull the goalie I wanted to be ready.

I hoped for the best and feared for the worst. I worried it would take long months, or years to achieve a successful pregnancy. In my research I met so many women who that was the case for. I prayed for their success as well as my own.

Six weeks after taking the sport off the practice field and getting in the real game we found out we were pregnant. I couldn’t have been happier… Or more scared.

Thirteen weeks later I’m still scared out of my mind, but happier than ever. I can’t believe I’m going to be a mother… On or around June 25th, 2010. I’m a mom-to-be, and it feels good!

I’ve been journaling this entire journey to motherhood on my blog since before I was sure I was ready to be a mom. I’d love to document this next part of my journey–the most exciting part yet–My pregnancy here, on Real Mom! I hope you’ll join me. And from the sounds of it, there’s a lot of fun in store!

Jennifer is nearly 14 weeks pregnant and lives in Texas.  Over the next 6 months, together, we will watch Jennifer grow, hear her babies heart beat, learn the sex of the baby, help Jennifer curve cravings, pick the Nursery crib set and more!

Jennifer will use our Restoration Team and build a work out regimen for during and after pregnancy, work with our Financial Advisor on a comfortable budget and set financial goals, talk to our Pediatrician about picking one near her, learn the best foods for babies growth and the first years of childhood with our Nutritionist and much more!

Together, YOU and Jennifer will laugh with one another, share personal stories and guide each other through this miracle!

After the New Year, we will introduce Jennifer in person to YOU on The Real Mom TV and begin hearing from Jennifer on a regular basis.

Look online for your chance to help Jennifer pick Nursery items, strollers and more!

www.therealmomtv.com